First of all, I just love The Vault. It is exciting and encouraging to me to see that we all have little self-doubt gremlins whispering in our ears, mostly the same things! I like too that it gets dumped every week.
Secondly, it is really exciting for me to read about and see women courageous enough to make so-called "mistakes" and then just keep right on going. Let's face it, lots of people share their successes, which are indeed inspiring. But to share your mistakes and then to work to turn them into something that does fit in a beautiful way---that's even more inspiring to me. Like this beautiful example of Kim's work; if you are an artist, do not miss it. Or Suzie's move across the country. This inspires me.
After reading chapter three, I liked the examples of the women following their fascinations. I thought they were cool. For them, not for me. I don't know that I have fascinations. I'm like Janet (page 54) who wants to "read books, take walks, and watch college basketball". Well, I'd watch college basketball if I had time. It sounds like lots of fun. When Barbara Sher wrote,
"The good life is when you get up in the morning and can't wait to start all over again,"I thought,
"Really? Does anyone really, truly, feel this way? I want to. I absolutely do feel this way in Hawaii when I'm on vacation. But then...who wouldn't?"The truth is, a good day for me is when I get done more tasks than were added by the day; in other words, when I'm not more behind than I was when I woke up.
Most of the time, my day rushes in before I've gotten out of bed, and I'm filled with the physical pain of getting up (physical illnesses and aches and pains or God forbid a migraine), the dread of the day (can I get it all done? how far behind am I?), and wondering when or if I'll get a break to do something I enjoy. And I don't hate what I do---it's just work. I've never done work that made me want to do it again the next day or would make me sorry that I had a day off or even sorry that I had a sick day. I've had lots and lots of jobs, done a variety of things I enjoy, but when you turn them into something that needs to be done at a certain time on a certain day, begin to stack them next to each other, and then bring in the money component, anything loses its attraction for me. I would give a lot to feel like Barbara Sher. That sounds amazing. Truly amazing.
So what do you think? I wonder if I just haven't discovered any fascinations...I'm 51 years old, so when will this happen? Or is Barbara Sher experiencing something that is more idealistic than not?
~Photo of gremlin from fearthebeard.org
~Photos from Hawaii by LoveHubbie Mark