Wellness Wednesday: Well Lifestyle Experiments, An Invitation!

Today on Wellness Wednesday I wanted to launch a new series here at the happyluau called "Well Lifestyle Experiments" (WLE). I invite each of you to join in! This series will focus on healthy lifestyle habits, healthy aging, well being, and experimenting with supportive habits. It is an EXPERIMENT--for me, for you. With each post, I'll focus on one thing that I want to experiment with and invite you to consider it too--of course modifying it to fit your unique lifestyle and way of being in the world. In the comments we can discuss this topic and share how it's working out for us as well.

The goal of Well Lifestyle Experiments for both of us will be to figure out which habits or ideas support the lifestyle we want and which ones we want to sustain and incorporate into who we are. And to encourage each other on our journeys to live healthier, feel better, think supportively, and be authentic. So if you are reading this, consider yourself invited!


I have a wealth of ideas to start with. Initially, I'm going to choose meaningful practices from several sources: 


(1) Lessons--incredible lessons--I learned from my visit with Kelly Kikipotamus the Hobo in March. 


(2) Ideas from friends who have embraced a well-being focus, like Kate Iredale. 


(3) The Radiant Goddess e-course that I am taking, along with my friends Lori-Lyn Hurley and Jessie Marianiello. 


(4) Stuff I read elsewhere, things that the Universe serendipitously brings my way. 


(5) Great ideas you mention to me in the comments that make me want to blog and share them with everyone, instead of leaving them semi-buried and away from the search engines. 


The cool thing is that as we are going along, helping each other, I'm thinking that others will find these posts and be inspired to create healthier lifestyles, maybe in just one small area--but every small step can make a really big difference over time! Many lives can be changed for the better. 

Wellness Wednesday: Kikipotamus the Hobo and the happyluau Eat Well!

So Kelly and I have been eating amazingly well while she has been here, partially due to Kelly's dietary resolve, and partially due to the easy availability of healthy organic fresh foods here in Olympia and in my kitchen. My eating habits have changed dramatically for the last three plus days and I feel great!

Instead of eating hurried meals of whatever I can grab (healthy, organic, but processed and quick), whenever I can grab it, we are eating meals on a regular schedule. Small meals. Simple meals. Mostly vegan-esque, because Kelly minimizes dairy and gluten and sugar and fatty meats. All of these choices are so good for me. But I also need a lot of protein and healthy fats, so we have been also eating clean meats and good fat sources (like ground up flax seeds).

Kelly is the first person who has visited me who has been excited that I have flax seeds and a dedicated grinder to add them fresh-ground to each meal. Most people think that is weird and kind of crazy. That kind of symbolizes a lot of how this visit has gone food-wise and otherwise, really.

Most people think that I am incredibly eccentric, especially in my food choices, often expressing disapproval. I typically have to modify my lifestyle a whole lot to make most visitors to my home  comfortable. Consequently hospitality can require a lot of planning and effort for me to take care of myself and I usually just forget about that in order to accommodate my guests. Of course, this is not the best idea but it's what I've usually done because I love it when people visit and would much rather take care of them than me. Not that it has to be a choice of course, but in the past, that's what I've done.

So Kelly's visiting has shown me what it could be like to live with someone with shared values and lifestyle--not identical, but similar enough for comfort delight.

Last night we ate out at my favorite restaurant. I had a dish called "Tails & Trotters Pork Ravioli" with wilted cabbage and fennel, roasted artichokes and lemon-vinagraitte asparagus. At first we thought that the "tails" might be a pig's tail or an ox's tail accompanied by some type of foot (like a pig's foot). Kelly asked the waiter and we discovered that this was a brand name, "Tails & Trotters". This is a company that treats their pigs quite well and feeds them hazelnuts only as part of the finishing process so that the delicate pork flavor is infused with hazelnut. I decided to order it and it was the best meal I have ever had there.

Kelly likes to eat slowly and quietly and mindfully and I do too. Unfortunately for her I am a chatterbox at meals because I enjoy so much having someone to eat with. Still, it has pushed me in the direction of eating more mindfully, which has been helpful to me...it is the direction I wish to move towards--not for all meals of course, because many meals clearly are social, but for solitary meals and certain meals with company. I see this as a life practice.

So I have been looking forward to each meal and ended it feeling filled but not full. Left feeling satisfied and nourished. During the day I have felt as though many of my social needs are being met and I do not feel at all interested in emotional eating at night; this is a profound change for me. I do think that the two are connected, a surprise to me as an introvert. I am certain that it is time for this introvert to branch out and seek more like-minded social connections.

So, I am wishing each of you an especially well Wednesday this week! I welcome all of your comments. I am especially interested in if and how you have any special rituals around eating that make this universal activity more meaningful to you.

PS. I have another post from earlier today catching you up a bit on Kelly and my activities...and there is more to come soon...the drums are beating at the happyluau!

Wellness Wednesday: In Gratitude

Thank you to everyone who commented on my post about my professional plans and NaNoWriMo. You all helped so very, very much.

I really liked Patti's plan of mixing creative alone time with time out spent with others part-time. That really is what is appealing to me the most right now. Kate R. suggested following what gives me joy, and I so want to remember that. Mary Catherine and Kate I. brought up that I could decide after I have more information after November, and that is what I think will also work best for me. Kate I. also reminded me that I can change my mind if something doesn't work, and that uncertainty can be a fine place to rest...all will be well.

Everyone--Patti, Cinner, Kate R., Mary Catherine, Sarah, and Kate I.--all had encouraging things to say about NaNoWriMo, and guess what--I'm doing it in just 5 days--Whoo Hoo! For those who are interested, more info about NaNoWriMo is here, and one of my blog posts from 2007 about NaNoWriMo is here.

So this week I got out my trusty old AlphaSmart Neo whom I named Kaiolohia back in 2007. She had to be dusted out and pulled out from long-term storage as she hadn't been used at all in the past four years. She needed a whole new operating system installed, so I got to know the technical support people at AlphaSmart and was very impressed. I now have a dedicated word processor specifically for production writing, and she's all set up and ready to go! 50,000 words, here I come!

In addition, I looked back at my posts and videos from 2007 about NaNoWriMo and noticed that several of you who congratulated me about finishing four years ago are still readers of happyluau and are people I consider now dear friends: Patti, Kate R., Kristine, and Kelly. Thank you for hanging in there with me for so long. And thank you to all of you who read and encourage me with your comments. Today, I am so very grateful for YOU!

Floating In Limbo, Waiting, Learning...

It has been 17 days since I've last blogged and so much has happened, I hardly know how to catch up.

I've been "hanging in there", taking one day at a time, which for me is a triumph. I'm still here, and haven't fallen apart. Someone I care a great deal about is though (falling apart), health-wise and otherwise, making decisions that have really painful consequences. I've been working to take care of myself, to not be controlling (as much as I know how to do, a skill that I am continuing to hone daily) or interfering beyond sharing my concerns and offering my support. I've been working to not try to plan for the future, as it feels as though I'm standing on sand that is shifting below my feet and it's all I can do to not fall down or sink.

This takes up most of my life energy, of course. I don't have much creative mojo for writing or art. I know it will come back when there is the space for it.

I've missed Sacred Life Sundays, although life feels so sacred to me every single day. I feel blessed in so many ways and very happy to be alive. Happy to see.

I've missed Share the Joy Thursdays; I haven't been able to share the joy with you all, but have felt your joy as I've visited your blogs, usually not commenting, but not wanting to lose touch as I ride my roller coaster of a life. I've felt joy through much of my own each day as well, especially in the small things.

I've missed Wellness Wednesdays, but other than problems with minor anxiety-related things (e.g., insomnia, blepharospasm, globus hystericus, panic attacks, migraines, etc.), I've been remarkably healthy, one of the greatest blessings of all. I somaticize a lot, and these are things I've dealt with in the past in a less concentrated and less intense way and don't consider serious--just warning signs that my body is trying to process everything and is having difficulty. I do heed them, though, and am really focused on getting through this time. Sometimes I don't think I have the skills but really I know I do.

This weekend I'm doing the prep for a colonoscopy, which I'm having on Monday. I had one that was unsuccessful two years ago and have been working up the courage to repeat it. This definitely qualifies as a Be Brave challenge for me, as I dread them. For some weird reason, I really fear perforation of my colon--I'm actually phobic about it--but only during a colonoscopy, which limits the problem that it is in my life. It's pretty much the only thing I'm phobic about and I don't get colonoscopies. Except for this one on Monday.

Then right after the colonoscopy I'm off to my stepson's wedding. My husband is the groom's father. The rest of the family--the engaged couple, the bride's parents and the groom's mother and stepfather--have primarily been involved in the planning, not us. We are paying for part of it and are invited to much of it. It will be great for LoveHubbie to see his family, especially his adult children, and get to meet everyone--the bride and her parents, especially. It's in Texas.

In this post, I think I'm not saying more than I'm saying, but I know you will understand and hear.

Wellness Wednesday: Processing the Past With Art and the Queen of Creativity

Two weeks have flown by since my last post. I still haven't written about the "tough times" I'm going through, but I promise I will.

I am leaving for a short trip to visit a close friend of mine in Phoenix and wanted to leave you with this before I go. I took a class called "Mixed Media 101" from Kate Robertson, the Queen of Creativity, and just loved it! Even though I'm not technically a beginner, as I've been doing art for several years, I needed a fresh start and this was it. I've invigorated my art! I wanted to share my art journal from the class with you.

The photos are somewhat small for privacy's sake for some of the pages. I used my art journal to vent and to process deep emotions and childhood issues.

This next page was particularly interesting as it was to teach us how to draw (especially if we felt we couldn't draw) from a photo. The little bird is what I drew and the photo is at the bottom.

This is a pocket I made with an artist trading card on top. Inside the pocket I have a poem I wrote.

Kate taught us to do all of these things so "Thank you, Kate!" I recommend her class to you if you'd like to make an art journal like this and get started (or re-started) in mixed media collage and art!

See you next week when I return from Arizona :) Much love to you...I'll miss you all! xoO

Wellness Wednesday: Fun

I have been going through a bit of a tough time lately, which I will write about...just not today. Today is Wellness Wednesday, and so in honor of that, I want to write about something FUN! 

1. No matter what we are going through, we can always have a Grateful ♥ Heart.
Kelly has been writing about this topic, and about how when we are grateful, it can actually be creative and generative. So I have been experimenting with this idea. (I'll write more on this later.)

2. This is a fun picture (my new purple glasses--progressive bifocals--which I am not wearing them yet as I have to find a good time to break them in...yes, I am uber-procrastinating), and I'm sharing it to honor a promise I made to my friend EB (Angie). It is also to complement and honor the Queen of Arts (Kim Mailhot):

3. This is a list from a post by my friend Kate Robertson, who is teaching a class called Mixed Media 101. (I'll write more on this later, too...stay tuned!)

Check out this fun Life List found on Dawn DeVries Sokol's blog, D'Blogala... You bold the ones you've done:

1. Started your own blog

2. Slept under the stars

3. Played in a band 

4. Visited Hawaii

5. Watched a meteor shower

6. Given more than you can afford to charity

7. Been to Disneyland 

8. Climbed a mountain

9. Held a praying mantis

10. Sang a solo 

11. Bungee jumped

12. Visited Paris 

13. Watched a lightning storm at sea

14. Taught yourself an art from scratch Knitting, painting, drawing...

15. Adopted a child

16. Had food poisoning

17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty

18. Grown your own vegetables 

19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France 

20. Slept on an overnight train 

21. Had a pillow fight 

22. Hitch hiked (in 1976 with LoveHubbie)

23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill (not physically)

24. Built a snow fort

25. Held a lamb

26. Gone skinny dipping (too numerous to count)

27. Run a Marathon 

28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice

29. Seen a total eclipse

30. Watched a sunrise or sunset (gorgeous!)

31. Hit a home run

32. Been on a cruise

33. Seen Niagara Falls in person

34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors

35. Seen an Amish community 

36. Taught yourself a new language 

37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied

38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person

39. Gone rock climbing

40. Seen Michelangelos David

41. Sung karaoke  

42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt

43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant

44. Visited Africa

45. Walked on a beach by moonlight

46. Been transported in an ambulance

47. Had your portrait painted 

48. Gone deep sea fishing

49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person

50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris

51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling 

52. Kissed in the rain

53. Played in the mud

54. Gone to a drive-in theater 

55. Been in a movie 

56. Visited the Great Wall of China

57. Started a business

58. Taken a martial arts class

59. Visited Russia

60. Served at a soup kitchen

61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies 

62. Gone whale watching

63. Got flowers for no reason

64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma

65. Gone sky diving

66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp

67. Bounced a check 

68. Flown in a helicopter

69. Saved a favorite childhood toy 

70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial 

71. Eaten Caviar 

72. Pieced a quilt

73. Stood in Times Square

74. Toured the Everglades

75. Been fired from a job (too numerous to count)

76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London

77. Broken a bone

78. Been on a speeding motorcycle 

79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person

80. Published a book

81. Visited the Vatican

82. Bought a brand new car 

83. Walked in Jerusalem  

84. Had your picture in the newspaper

85. Read the entire Bible

86. Visited the White House

87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating

88. Had chickenpox

89. Saved someone’s life 

90. Sat on a jury 

91. Met someone famous

92. Joined a book club

93. Lost a loved one 

94. Had a baby

95. Seen the Alamo in person

96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake  

97. Been involved in a lawsuit 

98. Owned a cell phone

99. Been stung by a bee

100. Read an entire book in one day

Wellness Wednesday: A Diagnosis

Recently I've been having some trouble with my eyes. I have very good eyes, but many eye issues, some of them genetic, and in addition a really high myopic prescription. I've also had a retinal detachment--about 15 years ago--and eye surgery. Over the years though, my eyes have done a yeoman's job of consistent hard work bearing up with all of the paces I've put them through with voracious reading, computer work, and other types of close work.

About every decade or so my vision changes and it's a big huge deal. Everything I do involves my vision and so it is a challenge to get through my life while dealing with the old glasses that don't work, traveling to get the new prescriptions when I can't see, discovering and dealing with incorrectly made glasses, coping with the frustration of prescriptions that unavoidably need to be tweaked, etc. I need to see at least an opthalmologist, optometrist, and optician and they all have to work together. I now have a good team but it will still take some time to get glasses that work.

I haven't been online as much, and each time I do go on it means dealing with eyestrain, headaches, etc. No more keeping up with my Twitter stream, and barely keeping up with Facebook, everyone's blog, etc. I haven't read a book or written an Amazon review in quite a while.

Then yesterday I had the exam with the opthalmologist. I'm supposed to go every year, but have put it off for three years because I really--really--dislike the retinal exam, and my eyes have been fine. No good excuse, but still...He found two new diseases. The first one is probably/possibly inconsequential--Fuch's guttata--I don't have it too badly at this point. The second one is serious.

So I have macular degeneration. I am pretty young to have it. It may progress slowly or quickly, and there is no way to know, but I need to be very careful with my diet to maximize a slower progression. I may die still being able to see or I may lose my ability to read, see faces, and drive "soon"--whatever that means. Since this was just yesterday I am reeling with the shock of the diagnosis and random ideas like:

• I may only be able to read 100 more books. (See, this was actually true before but I didn't know it...it's true for everyone.)
• Last week I was worried about having time to do art...now I'll be lucky if I can see art.
• I may see my last Maui sunset on our vacation to Maui next month. (Better to be grateful to ever see a Maui sunset!)
• I may someday not be able to keep up with my online community. Or google things.
• My life may be limited in ways I can't imagine soon. 

At the same time I am having other more positive random ideas like:

• I fell several times in the last ten years and never lost my vision (I have weak retinas)--I have been blessed every time. 
• My life is not in danger from this.
• Some things are way, way more important than they were a couple of days ago. Some things are much less important. Things are moving into perspective--a good thing.
• Many people have low or no vision and have full lives.
• Change is inevitable.
• Each one of us has challenges and limitations due to disease and/or aging, and I am incredibly blessed to have health insurance, the financial resources to address this, and nutritional knowledge which may now help to save my sight. 
• God and/or a Loving Universe will not give me more than I can handle, and all will be well.

It takes time to process a difficult medical diagnosis. Doing so is life-changing. Having lots of feelings--even being an emotional basket case for a while--is totally normal. So that's what I'm up to. I've been having some tough days...and...all is well.

All is well.

Wellness Wednesday: I Lost Some Weight

Well, I'm very happy to report that I have finished the diet I've been on since November 1st--the homeopathic hcg diet--which is actually more of a semi-fast and a detox than a diet. I lost 27.4 pounds in 44 days, so I'm very happy with my results. I also felt terrific once I got used to it. I've gone down several sizes and feel energetic and happy.

I used the semi-fasting and the detox as a time to work really hard on various emotional issues that have affected my being overweight. I did this by journaling, reading (including Marianne Williamson's "A Course in Weight Loss"), and especially by "tapping" using fasterEFT, a type of emotional acupressure that is a combination of regular EFT, neuro-linguistic programming (NLP) and hypnosis.

If anyone is interested in finding out more, I do have a private blog that you are welcome to read if I know you, i.e., if you are one of my regular blog readers. There's not much about the diet itself on there as far as instructions and such, just extreme detail about me and my daily eating and feelings, following the diet, and various personal issues. I blogged every day I was on the diet and will continue to blog about maintenance, just not daily. Email me or comment if you're interested.

I'll now be on a maintenance plan that I've customized to fit my needs (basically a whole foods healthy lower glycemic diet) for several months. Then in the spring (probably March) I'll go on it for a second round. I won't lose as much, but since I'm still quite overweight it will make a difference. I'm hoping to be able to maintain the weight loss until then; it will be a learning process, I'm sure.

Now that I'm not blogging on my diet blog as often I hope to be more available to blog here, so you'll be seeing me around a bit more!

Wellness Wednesday: Being With Each Flower, What is More Important?

Today I read something beautiful on Kelly's blog that caused me to think, to really reevaluate and reframe something in my life. Kelly wrote that she was grateful for:

“Being wrapped all day in the kind of energy that made people open to me like flowers in the rain.” 

What a lovely thing to be, what a lovely gift to give people--this kind of energy that makes people feel comfortable enough to share themselves with you.

All of my life, I have struggled with this gift. It is a gift from God, nothing that I've cultivated or would even know how to develop. On the one hand I have enjoyed this closeness with others, delighted in it, reveled in it, when it has been with someone with whom I've wanted to be intimate. On the other hand, sometimes it is time-consuming or awkward or (to my embarrassment) even irritating when I am in a hurry and someone I barely know opens up to me and share deeply personal "stories of their lives", their deep feelings.

This gift is what led me to go to graduate school to become a counselor. I never finished, though, instead leaving school without doing a practicum and finishing my masters in another field, because I found it too draining to relate to people on that level all day long. I am very introverted, and although I care deeply for others, I need a great deal of time alone to process and recharge in order to be able to interact at that level. I also am not a particularly patient person, not a good thing for a counselor.

Lately over the last several years as I've experienced time as being scarce much of the time, it has been harder and harder to be welcoming when some people open up. People I meet casually, chance encounters that won't be repeated, people that I'd not choose to be intimate with. I usually still do listen and witness their story (trying to be "nice"), but find myself thinking thoughts like, "I can't believe this is happening to me again..." and "They're going to share their whole life story with me now right when I'm on my way to..." Complaining thoughts, I've realized. From the resentment I feel. This is not who I want to be.

In pondering Kelly's post, I've realized that deep down inside, I believe--I know--that every single person is indeed a flower, and that one of the most important things I can do each and every day is to witness their opening. To be present with everyone I meet. If they feel safe with me (and they are safe), then this is a bold, brave gift that I'm being given, and I want to recognize it as such. I need to slow down and stay in touch with what I truly value rather than be distracted by the urgency of comparatively petty tasks.

I always learn so much from Kelly, and this was a special lesson, one I really needed today.


~Photograph by LoveHubbie Mark

Wellness Wednesday: Life-Changing Wellness Seminar

About ten days ago I went to a really intense wellness seminar in Seattle. We all know about diet and how important it is to eat healthfully to have a good quality of life. We all know about exercise and how we need to keep moving in order to be able to stay mobile and healthy as we age. However, we often forget posture. I know that I did.

I have been plagued with back, neck, knee, and foot problems for years, so I had high expectations for this seminar from the Esther Gokhale Wellness Center. I was taking Gokhale Method 101, based upon the book I'd recently read, "8 Steps to a Pain-Free Back: Natural Posture Solutions for Pain in the Back, Neck, Shoulder, Hip, Knee, and Food (Remember When It Didn't Hurt)" by Esther Gokhale. This method is based upon how people throughout history have stood, have moved, and stayed healthy without all of the problems we experience in our post-industrial society. It is full of amazing pictures--a beautiful book that I've written a review of for Amazon here. If you go to the book on Amazon, you can use the "Look Inside" feature and see so much of the book (scroll down and you will see that there is a huge exerpt of the book, including pictures, that the author has made available).

Even if you just look at the pictures, I think you'll be impressed. You can actually see how differently people used to sit, stand, lie in bed, work, bend over, walk, and more.

I have begun integrating this posture practice into my life. Three days of classes were so very helpful, and now I need to follow up at home. The really good thing is that although there are some optional exercises for people like me (super out-of-shape with weak muscles)--for the most part this practice is done in the process of life itself and takes no extra time--while you're sitting, driving, moving about the house, working, playing, etc. There is also almost nothing to buy; there is an optional cushion that can help you stretch your back, but a towel or other support can be easily substituted instead. Also, there are free classes, online classes, and more.

This is not simply one person's ideas, but a new movement--a movement to help us return to some of the wise ways of our ancestors that led to health. It's really cool. I took a class in Seattle for which there was a fee, but my health problems are debilitating and I needed something intense and immediate to prevent much more money from being spent on other solutions.

Here are some pictures so that you can see some early changes in my way of moving. This picture is BEFORE, sitting normally (and up straight--I usually slump) on the edge of a chair:

This picture is two days later, after 9 hours of posture instruction:

This picture is BEFORE, standing normally. Note the swaying out in the upper back:

This picture is AFTER, standing normally. Note the straightness in the upper back:

No body cares too much about posture per se, but everyone cares about the benefits that good posture can bring. So if you'd like even more resources about this posture practice, here they are:

Can't Exercise at Work? Try StretchSitting (this is an article describing a particular posture practice in a bit of detail)

Video of Esther Gokhale talk at Google (this is a longer talk given for those of you who are very interested--it's wonderful though!)

Preview of book (8 Steps to a Pain-Free Back) on Google

Great book review along with picture of Esther Gokhale (the founder) bending as she sits (you can really, really see how Esther has an unconventionally healthy back)


I plan on continuing with this for a long, long time. I look forward to the health benefits that will ensue!

Wellness Wednesday: More Time Explorations

As I've been learning how to experience time as my friend I've discovered a few things. First of all, I'm absolutely on the right road and am just glad to be here. I am totally committed to this lifestyle, and benefiting from it on a day-by-day basis.

I've been hard at work on my book and have been able to create the time to enjoy immersing myself in it. It's required me to give up a lot, but I haven't sacrificed anything. I consider what I've gained worth every bit of what I've given up.

I've tweaked my schedule and cut out more "allowed television programs". I initially allowed myself certain favorite shows that I thought would help my writing or help me greatly in relaxing. Now, some seem to not be so important, and 14-18 hours of television per week seems like way too much. Yes, believe it or not, that's what I'd cut it down to. I won't tell you what I was watching before. I do watch television when I eat, because I only eat about two meals per week with LoveHubbie, and I don't like to eat alone. So this of course includes eating time. That makes it sound a bit better, doesn't it? Well, now I'm down to 7-13 hours per week. That feels much better and it's pretty much only when I eat. At night, instead, I read.

Write down for yourself the shows you allow yourself to watch; you may be as surprised as I was!

I've turned down social obligations that were true obligations instead of joy. This is helping me to have a good holiday season, because I never liked the different parties we attended in the past. There is one in particular I've disliked, a Christmas Tree Festival. People get dressed up in formalwear and go out and eat and drink and bid in an auction on forty or so Christmas trees decorated by different organizations. It is a fund-raiser, so everything goes for exorbitant prices. Then all of the proceeds go to charity. It's a way for people to give that I suppose is fun for many people. The auction goes on for about 5 hours. There is a lead up to the auction and then a wind down. Although you can meet lots of interesting people, and the Christmas trees are creative and pretty, you can't really talk for most of it as the auction is pretty loud and overwhelming for my INFJ-ness once it starts. It is a long night and recovery the next day. This year we'll just give the money outright where we want to.

I've found that it helps for me to work on Saturdays to make up for time I inadvertently miss during the week. LoveHubbie works on Saturdays, so it works out for us. I take off every Sunday for a sabbath rest. I also take off about a half day during the week and work on decluttering and other household chores.

It helps enormously in writing a book about Hawaii to immerse myself in the Hawaiian history for an entire day on an ongoing basis. The writing flows, and I can make connections easier between historical events. Before I'd write for a couple of hours on a given day, then not write anything more on the project for a week or two. Then again I'd write for a few hours, and weeks would go by. I never allowed myself to get into the space of writing on this topic long enough for it to do any real good. I'd forget the difference between Kaumuali`i and Keopuolani and Kauikeouli and Keali`iahonui and Kahekili and Keku`iapoiwa and Kekuiapoiwa. (These are all Hawaiian names and I am not fluent in Hawaiian! All the "K" names would blur.)  Now the hands of the clock roll around in warp speed as I write, oblivious to anything but my adventures in the world of Hawaii long ago.

I wouldn't trade it for anything.

~Photo of me on Dragon's Teeth Labyrinth in Kapalua, Maui. By LoveHubbie Mark. 

Wellness Wednesday: Creating Time Abundance

Is it possible to create time abundance? To cultivate an attitude of experiencing time as slow, as a friend, as there being more than enough to accomplish everything that the day should hold?

I think that it is, and this is what I'm doing.

It started a few weeks ago with a strong desire to find a way to prune my schedule so that I would have time for writing. I am working on a book that I've promised myself I'll deliver the next time I visit Maui. My co-author, guide, and Hawaiian cultural treasure is Akoni Akana. He is currently in a hospice in Honolulu, and I would like to finish this while he is still alive. Since he is so ill I will need to do this without him.

The second challenge with this book is that I did all of the research for it a last year. I put all of my materials in a very safe place for perpetuity and they will remain there because I haven't been able to locate them. So I'm writing the book without my prior work, essentially starting over, plus without Akoni.

With all of these obstacles I've procrastinated, but I promised Akoni and many dearly loved friends from Maui that I would do it, plus it is the dearest thing to my heart...so I needed to create a way to have it happen. Instead of just wanting and wishing and hoping that it would happen. Without direct action from me, it would not happen as I do not have "extra time" for writing.

So, I began taking some action, like refusing or canceling all social obligations I didn't need to attend. I also began to clean up my diet and lifestyle so that I'd have more energy. Then I found Christine Hohlbaum's wonderful book "The Power of Slow: 101 Ways to Save Time in Our 24/7 World". It's a new book that just came out, and unlike many of the books I've read on the subject, it goes beyond the philosophy of time abundance and the whole Slow Movement and into practical and concrete ways of implementing mindfulness and the philosophy of slow. If you want to find out more about the book you can visit Christine's blog, The Power of Slow, and follow her on Twitter.

I began to read The Power of Slow with my journal next to me, keeping a list of everything that struck me that I'd need to do differently or think differently. Then I took that journal, along with my lists, and combined them. My lists were: my To Do list, my list of values (I read this list every day to set my intention for the day in my quiet time), my list of my spiritual beliefs and my list of writing goals.

I know that's a lot of lists--too many. I made one big fat compilation out of all of these lists and my journal notes, using the old-fashioned cut-and-paste method.

Then I entered it into my computer so that I could constantly tweak it, as what I'm learning is on-going, so the document would have to be dynamic. And through these weeks I'll continued to implement the changes I've learned. I read the ONE list every day to remind myself of the changes until they become natural.

The new list includes things like limiting the number of television shows I keep up with. I have a list of programs I'm willing to give up my time for, and that's it. I hold myself to it. And I have a defined schedule, so that when people ask me for a time commitment, I check it and can say, "I can't do that, I'm working, but I'll be available after 4 p.m." For the last few weeks I've been saying, "No" constantly (but kindly). I've improved communication between LoveHubbie and myself and found ways to limit my exposure to his drama (which he likes and which supports his lifestyle but not mine) during my writing day. Theses are pretty straightforward, but they're big for me. I'll be writing about some of these thing and other changes and what I'm learning in future posts.

I am learning to view time as my friend and as an opportunity. It is not an overstatement to say that this has changed my life and is changing my life. More later!

Wellness Wednesday: Time Abundance

Writing what I did yesterday, I know that time abundance is the answer to what I struggle with. I masqueraded as a life coach in a former life, after all! I know that our perspective on time is all between our ears. However, it still is a major challenge for me.

I appreciated the blog series that Patti recommended in the comments. It's a four part series on The Elasticity of Time at Marelisa Online here. This led me to do a search on "time abundance" on Google, where I found this book, called "The Power of Slow: 101 Ways to Save Time in Our 24/7 World" by Christine Hohlbaum. It's a new book that just came out yesterday, and unlike many of the books I've read, it goes beyond the philosophy of time abundance and the whole Slow Movement and into practical and concrete ways of implementing mindfulness and the philosophy of slow. If you want to find out more about the book, look inside it on Amazon. Also, you can visit Christine's blog, The Power of Slow, and follow her on Twitter.

I'd love to hear from you in the comments on any thoughts or ideas or reflections you have on time abundance.

Wellness Wednesday: An Unusual Birthday Gift

Today is my birthday, and I celebrate today by acknowledging YOU, who have each and all helped make my past year the wonderful year it was! I reread the comments on my last post and felt so affirmed and blessed that each of you is a part of my community.

Today something important happened that I am now celebrating, something that is not traditional birthday fare.

One is that I stood up for myself with someone who does not value who I am. It was very, very hard, but it was one of those situations where I didn't make a decision---something primal just rose up in me that refused to accept being consistently treated in a poor way. It reminded me of a situation years ago with my mother.

My mother was my primary abuser as a child. One day, after 16 years of physical and verbal abuse almost on a daily basis, instead of hiding the bruises, I put on a dress (in those days you wore dresses to school, not pants!) with a lower neckline that showed the bruises where she had tried to strangle me the night before. I even pulled my long brown hair back into a ponytail so that the bruises could not be missed. I didn't decide to do this consciously; it just happened. For years I had hid the marks---for my whole life. I knew that was what you were supposed to do.

My teachers all asked me what had happened and I told them. I told them how she hit me all the time. How she screamed at me. Some days she beat me, as she'd say, "until I draw blood". My mother lost her job as the school truant officer. There were no other consequences, as it was a different time, but she never hit me again.

Back then, no one talked about child abuse. I don't think I had a conception of it as being "abuse". Something in me just finally knew that trying to strangle your daughter was wrong.

It was a very good feeling to stand up for myself. And when my mother died 6 years later, I didn't cry. I still have not cried, nor do I miss her.

So, standing up for myself was the absolute most important thing that I could have done for myself this year on my birthday. The feeling I have is one of sweet safety, holy self-care, the great kindness of the Universe, the incredible feeling of being loved by God and of knowing that His love is immense.

If any of you watched Saving Grace (my favorite television show) last night, the expression on Earl's face as he told Grace how much God loves her---this face, and what Earl said to her---it made such a deep impression that it carried me to a safe place, just as God carried Grace and Neely to safety in the show. It stayed with me through a difficult night. I don't think I will ever forget it.

So despite the unusual circumstances, it is truly a happy birthday for me. I feel those feelings---the feeling of "NO!" and the feeling of safety and love---and I would not exchange them for any other birthday gift at all.

Wellness Wednesday: Everything Will Be Alright

This picture is from Amanda at kind over matter, was originally uploaded by thejoysofjess and beautifully says my thoughts and wishes and prayers for you on this Wellness Wednesday!

Wellness Wednesday: Working in an Office

Well, here I am working at my office on Wellness Wednesday. My job is explaining products that help patients achieve a greater level of wellness. The work is very slow, which is why I have time to get to figure out how to use my new iMac, as well as blog here---this may be a good thing. 

It's funny that I'm working in an office supporting wellness, because I'm thinking that working in an office environment might not really support my own wellness.

I'm in an office which is very nice as far as offices go. It doesn't have any windows (unlike my house) so I feel like I'm in a nice walk-in closet. It is also very, very warm. Sauna-warm, which everyone else here likes. LoveHubbie brought in a fan, which helps circulate the air and makes a big difference; I can already tell I'm going to be less drained today than yesterday.

The weather outside is at last delightful, and I'm indoors. Admittedly, my timing has been off for some time.

I keep appealing to the altruistic side of me, the part that really, really wants to help people. I want to make a difference! I also keep appealing to the my ambitious side, the part that wants to build a business. I also keep telling myself that I need to stick with this for a while and see if I can earn some money, that it takes time. And I really don't want to let anyone down. Despite the appeals, I still am not having any success in being happy about being inside. About being here.

Ok, so I hate it. 

Last night I had nightmares about being arrested by the US Government and dunked naked into a cesspool of smelly water swimming with large worms that attached themselves to me like leeches. I was going to jail for at least a year and wouldn't be allowed access to any of the things I needed. It was a rather severe jail without any amenities or services (like newspapers or television or medical care). It was really hot there too. I woke up screaming and with a bad migraine. 

This was not a good sign.

I could tell it was a sign, too, and that I should listen to it even though I don't want to.

Today I've been reflecting in my closet office. I really want to make a contribution here, but I'm not yet convinced that this is going to work for me. More than anything I miss my "mind freedom"---the many opportunities I had during the day to let my mind roam free, to think about things, to mull things over during mindless but oh-so-calming household tasks. I think that a lot of my days at home were spent in a kind of meditation, wandering around doing things but also absorbing the beauty of nature. I also miss the schedule freedom---the ability to plan out my day and to build in exercise and creative breaks and appointments. I was outside and inside, moving around, walking and exercising. It feels like I've lost so much. LoveHubbie says, "That's what work is." 

I disagree with LoveHubbie. I could still build my business while working from home, but do it while making calls as I'm walking on my driveway or sitting on my deck in the garden. Or folding laundry. Doing the dishes. Opening the mail. Dang it, I miss my UPS man even and it's only been two days. 

When I'm in this office I feel like a prisoner.

What's the point of me having my own wellness business if it doesn't serve my own personal wellness? I may as well work for a salary instead. At least then I'm exchanging my life energy and creativity and precious time for money (I currently just earn a commission...at least in theory, because I haven't made anything at all yet in the past two days).

I made a commitment so I won't quit, but I may have just talked myself into reducing my hours. Dramatically. We'll see.

Wellness Wednesday: National Grump Out Day

Did you know that today was National Grump Out Day? No, this does not mean it's a time to "grump out" as in "wig out" or "pig out". It's a day to banish grumpiness; it's a day to be out with or done with grumpiness! (Sort of like a "Smoke Out" is when you stop smoking for a day.)

So, today I'm going to inform my curmudgeon spouse LoveHubbie of the importance of celebrating NGO Day---be sure to inform the grumpiness person you know and maybe they'll get in the spirit of the day and "grump out".

If you are the grump, it's a great day to put grumpiness behind you and instead breathe in gratitude, love, and appreciation for all of life! After all your attitude profoundly affects your mental health and your physical health as well.

Although I am not typically a grumpy person, I am choosing to be inspired today and focus on all of the many things that go right with the day and all of the many blessings I experience! Let's celebrate together!

~Photo by Grumpy Curmudgeon LoveHubbie Mark

Wellness Wednesday: Overhauling for Health

I feel like I'm having a major overhaul in my health lately, one that is much needed. I joined a gym last week and have been working out (sort of). I keep having to modify my workout to accommodate my level of fitness, which is stunningly low. This past week I learned to focus on what I can do not what I cannot do.

Also this week I've cleaned up my eating even more and am taking more of the superfoods that I'm marketing. It has increased my energy level even more. It's also influenced me to make healthier food choices in general. And to do less emotional eating. So I've really been feeling great.

We've had sun here. Yes, really. In Washington. That has been great for my vitamin D levels. You sort of have to wait and watch and zoom outside when the sun is shining, then walk until it disappears, which sounds weird, but it's really fun. It's like a game---"catching the sun". If you live in the Pacific Northwest then you know what I mean.

Lastly, I've been really supporting myself with television. I love tv, but don't have enough time to watch the amount I enjoy. There is so much great stuff on, that I only get to watch a small portion of what I want to. So this last week I've been substituting my favorite shows and movies with "The Biggest Loser" and PBS specials from Mark Hyman (health oriented). It's been incredibly motivating. I had never watched "The Biggest Loser" before, but my gym, 24 Hour Fitness, which I just love, is affiliated with it, and although I don't agree with some of the philosophies behind it, parts of it are incredibly motivating.

I have never been a gym person, but I adore 24 Hour Fitness. Who knew? I've always thought that if they could make a gym that didn't stink, that wasn't hot, and that played peaceful music where everyone moved slowly, I'd love it, but I never found one. Either the smell, the pounding music, or the fit people looking askance at me would be big turnoffs. So my gym smells just fine and is nice and cool. It does play the pounding music, but I've found that since I'm going through this interesting personality change lately that it doesn't bother me at all---I kind of like it! And there are other fat people everywhere! It's a whole new world out there for gyms. People of all sizes want to get it shape and be healthier.

I enjoy going in and greeting the friendly staff, and then working out with all of the different people---all of whom have been really nice to me, even though my workout is unconventional (it's gyrokinesis plus other exercises to strengthen my knees right now). And exercises I make up myself.

Here's a video that shows you more about gyrokinesis. Now imagine me doing this at the gym!! (This video is only 2 minutes long, the rest is music and darkness...)


~Photo by LoveHubbie Mark

Wellness Wednesday: Stamina and Carly Grace

Only just over a day before I leave for Hawaii, and there are so many posts I'd like to do.

Yesterday was really a Wellness Wednesday for me. I was fitting in some last health care appointments. In addition, I continue to struggle with complications from my dental surgery about 10 days ago. All in one day I visited the podiatrist to get a cortisone shot in my foot, both the dentist and the oral surgeon and had two minor surgical procedures---one from each of them, the pharmacist to get enough medications to last for the time I'm gone, the lab to do some tests due to complications from the antibiotics I've been on ("c-diff"), and the chiropractor. I visited my husband's office in between these as well. It was a crazy hectic day and I was in pain the whole time.

However, due to the supplements I've been taking from my new alternative medicine physician, I was mostly able to be calm through all of this. I was able to practice letting go of results and in trusting in a safe Universe, because there was really nothing else I could do. I have to trust that when I leave town packed with my contingency meds and records for potential surgeons on Maui, that all will be okay. Truly, not having an undercurrent of anxiety all of the time has helped me so very much, and enabled me to deal with so much more than in the past. In addition, having good energy levels (from the thyroid my doctor prescribed) helps tremendously as well.

I feel blessed, blessed, blessed to be able to have access to and to afford all of this health care. I feel supported by the Universe. I am so grateful for my friends---you all---here online, and new ones I've met on Facebook and Twitter.

I feel extremely inspired by a very little girl named Carly Grace, who has her own blog, and whose parents manage somehow (I don't know how) to have a positive attitude towards all of her health challenges and who model the attitude to life we could all have. They live in the moment and love their daughter. Please read her blog, and please pray for her upcoming surgery (one of dozens she's had, but what sounds like the biggest one yet). Please hold out healing energies for her and send love to her parents. They are wonderful people who I read about months ago from yertle. If you take a second to go there, even just to see her sweet little face, you will gain so much and you will remember her always. Just a quick look and a prayer and it will make a difference. As importantly, if you take the time to go back and back and back and read her blog, your life will be different, I promise you.

~Photo by LoveHubbie Mark

Wellness Wednesday: Gratitude

This Wellness Wednesday is a day late because I recently had dental surgery. But yesterday and today I was really grateful. Grateful for the resources to have dental surgery. Grateful for someone (LoveHubbie) to accompany me to the procedure. Grateful to see an end to the pain I've been having. Grateful to be able to rest up and take care of myself without worrying about economic loss.

But the surgery and other events caused me to be grateful in a different way as well. It made me think of all of the things in my body that do work right.

For example, right now my body is aggressively healing. It is supported by lots of different medications, and by healing prayers and energies sent by you all. But it is doing much work right now, all without my active participation. Of course, I provide it with sleep and rest, but basically I'm unaware.

My personal assistant, Sweetie, acquired Bell's palsy last week. She is young and healthy, and it just happened. Aside from the fact that her face sags on the left side as though she'd had a stroke, her biggest problem is having to manually blink her left eye--it no longer blinks on its own and the blinking is vital to the eye's health and maintenance of vision. So she continues working, because she has to, and manually blinks her eye as she does.

How often are we aware or grateful that our eye blinks? Do we thank it for blinking for us? Are we thrilled in a given day that we don't have to manually blink our eye?

Thousands of miles away in Honolulu my co-author Akoni languishes in a hospital, having lost his leg to diabetes, losing his hands to gangrene. I imagine he is happy for every moment of life he has left. My heart aches for him daily. I am hoping that I get to visit him on this trip to Hawaii, and I am afraid it will be the last time I see him. He has trouble eating, and must now be fed.

How often are we excited that we can eat on our own without assistance? I don't remember feeling this way ever.

These two people I know, but others as well, are examples for me in living courageously with whatever problems I might have. And they remind me to be grateful for small things that are so vital, but that I overlook. I don't want to overlook. I want to be filled with gratitude every day.

If you are feeling poorly today, stop overlooking your many numerous blessings. You'll feel better. I promise.

~Photo of Lavender Field, representing Abundance, by LoveHubbie Mark