Cleaning Up the Mess

Oh my, what a mess we have here!

After Snowmageddon 2012, we had a wind and ice storm that brought down more debris, so I have my hands full helping to coordinate the cleanup with the assistance of our wonderful insurance agency. I'm learning a lot about many different things and meeting new people--our project manager (who works with the construction workers, the roofer, the painters, and the gutter installers), an arborist who will see what trees can be saved, the people who will clean up the large debris and do chipping, and our terrific gardener who is taking care of regular debris cleanup.

While this is going on, I am making a short trip to Atlanta to support a relative there in the treatment program I've visited before. It is an alumni visit, a reunion of sorts, and I'm quite excited about it.

The mess will still be here when I return, but I think good progress will be made.

I am so very, very grateful for power.

I am also grateful to NOT be one of the people who had trees fall and crash through their roofs, effectively cutting their houses in two. Or who had their roofs pierced by a tree branch and now have water all over their belongings. Or who didn't have insurance and now are faced with overwhelming financial losses.

This storm was something that I know we all will remember here for years to come.

Thank you for all of your support, prayers, and comments, my friends.

One Year Ago Today

Today is my deceased mother's birthday, but that's not why I remember today.

Today is the date that a beloved uncle of mine died, but that's not why I remember today.

Today I am so grateful. One year ago today I got a diagnosis of macular degeneration and thought I was losing my eyesight. I lived with this diagnosis for two months, until March 15th, when I got a second opinion from an expert in macular degeneration and found out I was fine. It ended up that I had several eye problems, but none of them that would cause blindness in the near future. These eye problems perfectly mimicked macular degeneration when seen by a general ophthalmologist who would not have all of the specialized equipment of a specialist.

I can see!

Those of you who are reading this normally can also see, and it is a blessed gift. Today, celebrate with me, and please grateful for the wondrous gift of sight!

Wellness Wednesday: In Gratitude

Thank you to everyone who commented on my post about my professional plans and NaNoWriMo. You all helped so very, very much.

I really liked Patti's plan of mixing creative alone time with time out spent with others part-time. That really is what is appealing to me the most right now. Kate R. suggested following what gives me joy, and I so want to remember that. Mary Catherine and Kate I. brought up that I could decide after I have more information after November, and that is what I think will also work best for me. Kate I. also reminded me that I can change my mind if something doesn't work, and that uncertainty can be a fine place to rest...all will be well.

Everyone--Patti, Cinner, Kate R., Mary Catherine, Sarah, and Kate I.--all had encouraging things to say about NaNoWriMo, and guess what--I'm doing it in just 5 days--Whoo Hoo! For those who are interested, more info about NaNoWriMo is here, and one of my blog posts from 2007 about NaNoWriMo is here.

So this week I got out my trusty old AlphaSmart Neo whom I named Kaiolohia back in 2007. She had to be dusted out and pulled out from long-term storage as she hadn't been used at all in the past four years. She needed a whole new operating system installed, so I got to know the technical support people at AlphaSmart and was very impressed. I now have a dedicated word processor specifically for production writing, and she's all set up and ready to go! 50,000 words, here I come!

In addition, I looked back at my posts and videos from 2007 about NaNoWriMo and noticed that several of you who congratulated me about finishing four years ago are still readers of happyluau and are people I consider now dear friends: Patti, Kate R., Kristine, and Kelly. Thank you for hanging in there with me for so long. And thank you to all of you who read and encourage me with your comments. Today, I am so very grateful for YOU!

Sacred Life Sunday: The Challenge Everyone Wants to Have

It is indeed a challenge to receive the good that is brought your way (at least for me) with everything else that is going on in the world. A part of me wants to mourn and just stay mourning, in honor of:

(1) All of the people at Virginia Mason Hospital who didn't get "good news", unlike me,

(2) Everything happening in Japan right now,

(3) People suffering all over the world,

(4) A friend of mine who is currently suffering with depression,

(5) Another friend of mine who struggles with chronic health problems that have been treated but continue to persist,

(5) My best friend Chani who died a year ago today,

(6) The sex trafficking that continues, while IJM works hard to combat it (my stepdaughter is working in the Philippines as a missionary to combat this, and dealing with inconveniences, discomfort, and physical isolation from her family and friends),

(7) Bullies who seem to "win" even though they really don't while but the strife they create endures,

(8) The many people who don't have jobs,

(9) Etc.

It is tempting to think, "I don't believe it" or "There must be a catch" or "I don't deserve this" or "This happens to other people but not to me". I have thought all of these things in the last few days.

Still, it is important to me receive. Accept. The good, the bad. All of it. Today, I am struggling to let the good in. To celebrate. I know that it's the best challenge of all. It's the one everyone wants, and I want it too.

It is a Sacred Sunday. Today I am wishing you the grace to receive the good, despite all of the suffering in our world, and even in your life. I am wishing you peace, joy, and acceptance of all of it--and most of all, innumerable lessons in surmounting the challenge of receiving the good.

Rejection

Today I wanted to write about rejection. I knew someone once who said, "Rejection is an inside job..." and it stuck with me. It's all in how you take things.

I experienced two rejections lately.

One was from some family members, a young couple, who decided to unfriend me on Facebook. I was quite surprised as I'd never been unfriended before. For those of you who aren't familiar with Facebook, it's very easy to "hide" someone whose posts you're uninterested in..."unfriending" is a deliberate act that restricts information and access so that you cannot see any of the person's private information, including photos, and whatever else they have restricted on Facebook's privacy as to be seen by "Only Friends".  It is a deliberate exclusion. They don't want you in their life.

Of course I thought that there had been a mistake. I value my relationship with this couple and like them both a lot. There was some family drama as other family members started to get involved; I ended up calling the couple to find out what happened and straighten everything out. A lot of inexplicable excuses were used, for example, "we're trying to avoid people who play all those games" (I have never played a Facebook game).

I finally got the message that they didn't want to be in contact with me, nor did they want me to see their pictures, nor did they want me involved as they move into a new and exciting phase of their life, one that I'd been looking forward to sharing with them. It was especially frustrating that they would not be up front with me--to be fair, I think they were trying to spare my feelings, and in addition, didn't really know how to be direct. I was sad and disappointed.

I told them I wished them well, and I really do. It doesn't make sense to have people in your life that don't want to be there. I felt hurt at first, but then later was grateful to them...when I realized some things after thinking about the situation some more.

I realized that almost all of the relationship was effort I'd made. Although I valued our relationship, in retrospect, I saw that this couple never gave me any signs that they valued it. I wrote that off at the time to them being young and very busy; now I think that it was something I wanted, so I imagined it. You can do that with Facebook.

The other rejection was not being invited to an (unrelated) important family function. The person in charge assured me that it was a mistake. At first I did believe her, and then later realized that it would be almost impossible to forget inviting me, but that because of other family members who would be there, my coming could make the event a potentially  awkward situation.

I thought about it a lot, at first feeling upset and angry at being marginalized, overlooked, "forgotten". It initially triggered my vulnerabilities I'm addressing with my word for the year--valid. Very quickly, I realized that it either was indeed an innocent mistake, or else it was a semi-tactful way of keeping other family members happy. And I ultimately was fine, though still sad, about it.

I think that rejection is someone telling you, either via honest communication or something else, that you are not a fit for a particular relationship or event. In their opinion.

In the case of a relationship, I want to always honor that, and be grateful to them for letting me know. I love that the relationships I do keep are mutual and involve an investment of time, affection, caring, etc. for both parties.

In the case of an event, I want to trust that I am not supposed to be at that event at that time--for whatever reason--and be at peace with it.

So, in a way, rejection is a gift. It is a blessing. It frees up time and emotional energy for the right people, the right events, at the right time.

I now feel good things towards everyone involved, and don't feel sad, angry, or offended...in fact, I feel grateful and clear and light.

How do you process rejection?

Letting Go and Happiness

With a big weekend coming up, I am needing to have an emergency trip to the oral surgeon. What I thought was an aphthous ulcer is actually an infection all around my dental implants and possibly an abscess. It hurts to talk and can't chew at all.

We have company coming (a rare event at our house in the woods) and I am singing in a choir and as a cantor this weekend. I have two receptions to go to as well. Oh, yes, and I restarted my diet semi-fast just a couple of days ago. I'll tell you about those things later. At any rate, it's kind of bad timing here!

The only possible thing to do is to let go.

I am fortunate in that things seem to be working out. My dentist saw me as a walk-in when I was out doing errands and couldn't stand the pain anymore. He irrigated everything to remove some of the pressure from the infection. Then he himself called the oral surgeon so that I could get right in. The oral surgeon is unfortunately at his satellite office about 45 minutes south of here. However, my assistant is working with me today and able to drive with me there in case I need to have a big procedure done. It is alternating rain with hail and I am so glad it isn't snowing.

I initially felt hit by fear and anxiety when I was first told the news, but there is truly nothing to do but let go and trust that all will be well, one way or another.

Isn't that all we can ever do?

I am realizing that this can be a very spiritual day, filled with lessons and trust and love, despite all of these circumstances. And truly, every day can be this way.

Wishing you (and me too) a day of letting go, trusting, and accepting with gratitude whatever it is that comes to interrupt your plans today.

Sacred Life Sunday: Today I Can See

This is a follow-up to this post about my diagnosis with age-related macular degeneration (AMD). It has now been 12 days since my diagnosis. I will be seeing a specialist in Seattle in mid-March for a second opinion and more importantly, more information on the specifics of my diagnosis and prognosis. I am doing well and am adjusting and best of all--today I can see--which I really and truly appreciate like I never have before. I expect I'll feel this way every day from now on.

I have done some things that have been helpful for me, but that maybe everyone can find some inspiration in:

(1) I have hyper-focused my life by evaluating what is truly important if I had, say, six months of vision left. What would I drop out? I'm dropping it out now. Why wait? Big changes in my life here. Everyone could benefit by thinking about this, don't you think?

(2) Although my vision is still poor, I was able to get accurate driving glasses. This means I can drive myself safely places during the day, including to Seattle to keep working on getting the other pairs of glasses I'll need. Instead of being frustrated about how blurry things are, I am grateful for every last little bit of blurry sight. I no longer feel much frustration at all, in fact. Why not always be grateful for what we do have, instead of focusing on what we are missing?

(3) I came up with a personal healing protocol of vitamin supplements (the only known thing that can positively affect AMD) and green superfoods. The doctor's nurse said, "Of course, you might think that this is the last thing you should be hearing from a doctor, and you might be very disappointed, but you need to include some specific things in your diet." I was overjoyed. There was something that I could do and it was something that I understood. Green leafy vegetables. Antioxidant fruits. I'm better with these than most people but not where I need to be, thus the superfood help. All is going well in this area as well. Why not improve our diets before we have to?

(4) I am using things instead of saving them for the future. Today is all we have. For all of us, today is all we have for sure.

(5) I am working to balance the time I spend in my head (previously 100%) with time spent in my body, focused on my body, doing things not involving my eyes and research and writing and thinking and typing and analyzing. Things like yoga. Listening to music. Meditating. Am I doing any of this? No, not yet. Not at all. Yet. But I will. I guarantee you, I will. The resistance I have to doing any of this is enormous, and it involves changing the patterns of over a half-century, but I know that it will still happen. Without striving and pushing, it will happen.

(6) Accepting what I can change and what I cannot change. I am not in control, but God/Spirit/the Universe is. And this is the way it always has been, so acceptance is what is indicated. This helps me to relax and to feel relief and to know that everything is unfolding exactly as it is supposed to.



Today is also my 11th Wedding Anniversary with LoveHubbie Mark ♥

~All photos by LoveHubbie Mark. They are from several years ago, thus the blond hair and warm-looking weather :)

The Blessing of Warmth

The brutal cold and harsh weather helps me to appreciate the beauty and softness of the other seasons. I am not a big fan of winter.

I am a bit down on this weather after having something like two weeks with either minimal heat or no heat. The repairman came over and over again (5 times) and the system would be fixed for a few hours and then break again. Apparently it is a complex computerized system with many components and the mother board is bad.

On Thanksgiving night, a different repairman, the manager, and the owner of the company came out to fix our system, and they did. We now have both heat and humidity. This coming week, an expert from Honeywell will come out to permanently fix the system so that our thermostats and zones will work as well, and to repair or replace the mother board. The owner of the company has a lot of integrity; he apologized for the big mess, for all of the problems that we've been having. It was a great Thanksgiving gift.

This time of coldness and personal discomfort taught me to be grateful for blessings. When you are freezing cold, it's hard to think, hard to be grateful for anything. Everything in your world narrows down to one thing--getting warm. Survival. The longer you are cold, the harder it becomes. I am glad that our time was short. But now I really feel for all of the people who have no way of getting warm at this time of year, and there are many. Homeless people, for one. But also the working poor, who can't afford heat. There are many people our country and around the world for whom being cold is the norm.

We are so blessed it so many ways. Ways that we take for granted much of the time.

Today I am grateful to be warm.

~Photo by LoveHubbie Mark, edited by me

Peace in the Drama

One great side benefit from the homeopathic HCG diet I've been experiencing is a general sense of well-being, a great difference from my normal base state of generalized anxiety. That has been the best benefit so far. The sense of peace and empowerment has been valuable this month as different personal stresses have come up.

I had written on my diet blog that someone told me a secret that shook up my world and my sense of reality. Someone I'm close to, we'll call her "Calley",  told me that she is in fact an addict. All of a sudden all of the stories she has told me over many years that previously didn't make sense and sounded oddly convoluted now make sense. She is an addict and has lots of other problems too (obviously). She was honest with me after lying to me (and everyone else) for years, which I am very happy about, but now I need to decide how to be around her--where I need new boundaries and how to stay safe. Spiritually, my life is now all about letting go, so I need to determine how to let go in this situation. I'm not sure where I'm going to go with this as I am still in shock and a bit dazed, but I have prayed about it and am confident that I'll know what to do as time goes on. Lots of addict drama here, but all is fine. Again, that peace and empowerment sense is most helpful.

Peaceful feelings--knowing that God is control--and feelings of empowerment--knowing that I will indeed be able to do whatever I need to do--these are so vital to me today.

I am grateful.

Sacred Life Sunday: Blessed

On this beautiful Sunday morning, I am wishing you all a day of rest, peace, fun, play, delight, joy, and love. I am blessed and so are you. That alone is reason enough to have an amazing day!

~Photo by Sabrina Moran edited by me

Sacred Life Sunday: Cherishing My Life With Joy (Revisited)

Portions of this post were previously posted on Sunday, July 20, 2008--over two years ago! I wanted to update it for this Sacred Life Sunday. I still love the two quotes that were featured, and want to add one now that I am a Christian, which is:

 "...The joy of the Lord is my strength."--Nehemiah 8:10

This verse has meant so much to me as I've discovered a whole new--dimension, sort of--to joy. It completes this post from the past. So here is my post:

"I read this marvelous quote in a book I'm reading called "When You're Falling, Dive" by Mark Matousek. It has stayed with me, and I think I'm going to take it as my mantra for depression recovery:

"I don't have to earn my life anymore. It was given to me to cherish as I would a precious gift from someone who loves me and whom I love."---Jim Curtan

This same Jim Curtan also, referring to what he realized at a retreat, said:

"God said my job was joy. But joy is not just about being happy. Joy is a rigorous spiritual practice of saying yes to life on life's terms."

Drop dead profound.

And in the spirit of joy, and to counterbalance the lately more sad posts at the happyluau, here are some joy-filled pictures I've been saving to share with you. They didn't seem to go with any of my previous posts this week, but they will fit with this one!






~The two photos above are from Cute Overload, the happy hamster and the happy dog.




~This photo of the happy nuns is from this blog."

Ordinary Things

I was inspired to write this post by laundrygirl and Chani. Their recent posts emphasized gratitude and being content with the quotidian activities we all engage in. And of course, I am continually inspired by Kikipotamus the Hobo's ongoing Grace in Small Things adventure, echoed at times by AbitibiSouth. I am convinced that if we can learn to do this, we can have more peace and get more enjoyment out of life.

So today I thought I'd write a list of some for the small things that brought me pleasure, grace, and peace.

• Continuing recovery from my painful gum infection of the last few weeks.
• Not falling lots of times when I almost have.
• The silence that is around me for most of the day.
• A fountain pen that was a gift from a near stranger.
• Added by LoveHubbie: "The way a fire feels on your backside." (This would be the heat from a woodstove, not lighting your buttocks on fire.)
  
• Light rain for my walk (as opposed to hard, driving, drenching rain.
  
• Committing myself to finally doing some art (Kate's Striped Paper technique) which you can see more of here and here. I plan to do it with glue though as I don't have a sewing machine. I love the look of it.
  
• Having an empty refrigerator but finding some sardines.
  
• The clean light feeling I get when I wash my hair.
  
• Eyes that can see to read, still.
  
• Each and every one of you.

~Photo by LoveHubbie Mark

Sacred Life Sunday: Blessings and Poverty

I wanted to write today to tell you how much I appreciate all of my blessings, especially each one of you. I was talking to a friend yesterday and I told her that my most prized possession is my laptop, because it is a major way that I connect and interface with the world, with all of you.

As I watch the coverage of Haiti, I am reminded that even just in the stability of our country right now, even in the fact that we have food and water and a clean bed to sleep in (let alone new sheets), even in these little things, we are very blessed. We have so much! Our health, our jobs (or our ability to get a new job), our families (biological or chosen), a clear mind, being able to walk and feed ourselves--we each have so much that we take for granted.

Today I am focusing on not taking the foundation of abundance in my life for granted.

And praying for those who are in need.

Today I am reminded of those who are in spiritual poverty also. People who are searching for spiritual life. People whose spirituality is fear-based or even hate-based. They are in need too.

May we all--all--be blessed and have our needs met.

~Photo by LoveHubbie Mark

Recreating Christmas

So as many of you know, LoveHubbie and I are going to Leavenworth, WA to have a romantic getaway in an attempt to recreate Christmas from a holiday of tiresome depressive-type memories to something good. We are both pretty excited about it. I will be satisfied if we simply rest, relax, and focus on all of our many blessings, including each other. It 'tis the season for Gratitude!

I won't be taking my computer, but I'll take some pictures to post when we get back. I wish you all a wonderful time filled with gratitude for all we each have, because no matter how we spend this holiday we are surely blessed with abundance. Some of us will be having family challenges (like Mary Catherine) and opportunities to extend forgiveness, others will be enjoying the blessings of solitude and peace and absence of drama. Some of us are in different places from their loved ones, like Rick and Julia. Others of us have family members serving our country overseas. Some of us will be dealing with health challenges, like little Carly, who is again in the hospital; please pray for her. Others, like Kelly are starting whole new chapters in their lives. Still others are traveling...

One thing I know for sure is that we all have our greatest blessing in the people who love us. I am blessed with all of you, and I will carry you in my heart this Christmas season.

The Season, Estrangements, and Unconventional Christmases

I was moved by Rick's post on the JJL blog the other day about his unconventional holiday plans. I wrote a comment after the post that I want to expand here.

It's about what we call "the season".

We never have conventional Christmases. For the last ten, my husband has been mourning the loss of his children via estrangement after a difficult divorce. Each Christmas is a painful reminder of what he has lost. He makes calls and waits for them to be returned, which they rarely are. He knows they will never visit nor will they welcome his visits any more than his calls. He is accepting that he will probably never know his grandchildren. Since LoveHubbie's father died a few years ago, his extended family has also drawn apart. His stepmother is still grieving, mourning her husband, forgotten by the rest of his family. We call her and cry and miss Dad. His brothers may or may not talk but they are no longer close. For LoveHubbie, Christmas is all about family and about how he doesn't have it anymore.

I have not always enjoyed the holiday myself as my mother attempted suicide on Christmas Eve and then died ten days later; this was a capstone to many dreaded Christmases before that. As an adult, I’ve never been successful working myself up to be consistently enthusiastic about all of the festivity although I do make efforts occasionally.

For example. When LoveHubbie lived with his children, no one ever gave him presents, as his wife encouraged gift giving solely between herself and the children. LoveHubbie too would give to them, but no one would give dad gifts. This was their tradition. So for one of our first Christmases together, I gave LoveHubbie 100 gifts. Most were very small, and collected for several months beforehand and each wrapped individually. It took the whole day just to open them. I wanted him to know that he was loved and to make up for all of those years that everyone decided not to bother. My efforts grew less enthusiastic and eventually have extinguished over the past several years, deflated by LoveHubbie's despair and inability to enjoy good things at this time of year as well as the loss of my Dad (my father-in-law).

I have found a peace about the season, though, because I have been given a precious gift. I know how weird this is may sound, but the one thing that gives me warm feelings is that I am estranged by choice from my own biological family of origin. I was the "black sheep" of the family for years, and each and every year I celebrate inside that there are no more arguments, no more recovering from cruel remarks, no more dreading hearing the phone ring. I am safe from what they offer me. I wish my family love, blessing, and the togetherness that they share. I harbor no ill will for any of them; I wish myself only continued absence from their group. I do love them, very much, but from a distance, the only way I can survive. Every year at this time I marvel that another year has gone by and I haven't heard from them. Marvel in a good way, that after years of not respecting me in any shape, manner, or form, they have indeed respected this fervent and expressed wish of mine and left me out. Holiday gifts come in unusual packages sometimes.

This year LoveHubbie and I are having our first hopefully-romantic getaway in our married life at Christmas in Leavenworth, WA, a town that has recreated itself to be reminiscent of Germany. My husband and I fell in love years ago at Christmas time on our way to Germany, back when we’d first met each other so we both have high hopes for this. However, I’m moderating my expectations by hoping that it is at least easier than Christmases past with my husband. I will be satisfied with whatever this quiet adventure holds, open for magic, but glad to be alive and to have each other whatever happens.

For some people, Christmas is a time that highlights the absence of family, the losses of the years (because most of us started out with family of some sort), and the general sense of not fitting in with the pacing of the culture, especially if we don’t share religious beliefs either. If we don’t bake, or shop, or decorate, or rush—and don’t want to—it can be a time of alienation and of feeling alone. I wish for everyone--especially those of us who are different--especially us--an astonishing holiday season filled with joy and peace in finding a way to celebrate being alive, to celebrate being loved by God/Universe, and to celebrate being cherished by so many others, even if it's not by those who are blood-related to us. As my friend Chani says, to create new rituals. Rituals that connect us to Spirit and to each other.

As for me, I am grateful for all of you, my extended blog family whom I cherish, and who make happyluau a lovely warm blog home for me. This season, I celebrate each and every one of you. Know that you have made a huge difference in my life. You cannot know how blessed I have been to have you as my cyber family.

To some of you who have close families, a virtual family may seem pitiful or a false family or a poor substitute for the real thing. As LoveHubbie sometimes says, "For God's sake, Olivia, you've never even met them, they aren't even REAL!"

Let me tell you---as I tell him---it is life---you are life---life---for many of us, for me. It allows us to have a taste of what it feels like to be loved, to be known, to be listened to. It allows us to experience a corner of life's experiences we'd never otherwise get. I would be out in the cold, this I know. I would not be happy. I would not believe in myself. I would not be writing a book. I might not even be alive, for all I know.

So thank you, those of you I know who come and comment repeatedly and encourage me. Thank you to those of you who stop by now and again. Those of you who never comment. Those who found me in a search for something and came back. Those of you who became offline friends. You are all a part of my world, of my journey, a part of what enables me to live the best life possible, even to believe that I am loved by a benevolent Universe. There is nothing more real than that.

Six Things That Make Me Happy Today

I was delighted to receive the One Lovely Blog Award from Lori-Lyn this morning! So six things that are making me happy right now are:

1. Having a really long Quiet Time today, reading, thinking, contemplating, all in my pj's well into the afternoon. This is real luxury.

2. The sun shining and no responsibilities today.

3. A spontaneous invitation from our neighbors to have dinner with them around their firepit. This will involve barbecuing and wild salmon and great conversation. We will bring fresh greens harvested from our garden on the way over.

4. Good rest and long sleep last night.

5. Anticipating another quiet day tomorrow.

6. Kelly Kikipotamus the Hobo's Grace in Small Things lists that help me to observe and see the impact of the smallest things, which somehow are the most important.

And to pay it forward, 6 blogs that I'm finding especially lovely right now are:

Kikipotomus the Hobo

Hamquin's Hide-Not

Fumbling for Words

The Painted House and rocks, paper, scissors

Welcome to My Universe

Queen of Arts

And a special category for my friend Chani's lovely blog: Finding My Way Home

I am bestowing the One Lovely Blog Award upon each of you! And thank you so much, Lori-Lyn!

Sacred Sunday: More Gratitude

This Sacred Sunday I took inspiration from two friends: Rick, who challenges us to make a blessings list, and Chani, who shares her journey from a desperate situation to true happiness. I made my own blessings list, which I share below.

This is more important for me to blog about today, so I also have to apologize for waiting a little longer to share my news with you :) It's good for me to process it for a while.

So here, in honor of Sacred Sunday, is my gratitude list (in no particular order):

1 - Home: My peaceful, quiet home in the woods.

2 - Health: My healthy body, mind, and spirit that have survived so many challenges.

3 - Financial Security: Not having to work only for money but being free to work at what I like (a gift from LoveHubbie, the gift of financial security).

















4 - LoveHubbie.















5 - Freedom: Living in a country where I am free to choose, free to express myself, to choose my own religion. Free with laws that protect me, in a land of abundance.

6 - Hawaii: Being able to vacation in a place I truly love.




7 - Internet and Technology: Unites and connects me with friends and family-of-choice, enables me to have a like-minded community.

8 - God, the Universe: Who I am just beginning to come to know as good and kind. Who keeps me safe, even in difficult and painful situations. Who lives in each person. A spiritual path that is fulfilling and expansive.





















9 - Protection: I feel protected from so many things that could harm me. I know that there are many threats as life is fragile and an adventure, but I still feel as though whatever difficult things will happen to me, I will still be "safe"---as in being taken care of by God, and cared for even in death---not necessarily protected from "bad things".

10 - Opportunities: I feel that life's choices are limitless, that much of what happens I create, and that the opportunities are endless.

Sacred Life Sunday: Practicing The Sabbath and Getting It Right---At Last!

What a glorious Sabbath it was today. I had lots of time to read and putz around the house. I stayed in my pj's until about 2pm and then headed for the gym for a leisurely workout. I spent lots of time looking at my view outside the windows in my house, all of the woods and the garden. It was sunny and lovely.

And reading, reading, reading. All fiction. Pure decadent indulgence!

Lately I have had a few very supportive calls from friends who I'm convinced are angels in disguise. I'm getting ready to start a new job on Tuesday. It's doing the same thing I've been doing for the last month---marketing those fantastic supplements---but also doing patient education with the products in a medical doctor's office, the same physician who has been helping me with my health these past several months. It will mean not being totally home-based, something challenging but exciting to me as well. I feel healthy enough and strong enough to venture out and expand my life some more. One big plus: it's an all female office---all girls all the time---yay!

So I'm really enjoying this holiday weekend. It really feels like a Sabbath, like a time of rest, a time to center spiritually and to recognize my need to surrender and trust.

I'm glad I persisted in establishing a day of rest in my schedule; I want to keep this going as a lifestyle. I am so grateful!

I want to encourage all of you to take a Sabbath rest. Even if it is only a portion of the day, even if it's only an hour. I promise you, you'll benefit far more than the so-called "lost" productivity that ensues, which can more than be made up for by your renewed energy. If you have any thoughts about this, or any experiences to share, please comment!



~Photos by LoveHubbie Mark

Wellness Wednesday: National Grump Out Day

Did you know that today was National Grump Out Day? No, this does not mean it's a time to "grump out" as in "wig out" or "pig out". It's a day to banish grumpiness; it's a day to be out with or done with grumpiness! (Sort of like a "Smoke Out" is when you stop smoking for a day.)

So, today I'm going to inform my curmudgeon spouse LoveHubbie of the importance of celebrating NGO Day---be sure to inform the grumpiness person you know and maybe they'll get in the spirit of the day and "grump out".

If you are the grump, it's a great day to put grumpiness behind you and instead breathe in gratitude, love, and appreciation for all of life! After all your attitude profoundly affects your mental health and your physical health as well.

Although I am not typically a grumpy person, I am choosing to be inspired today and focus on all of the many things that go right with the day and all of the many blessings I experience! Let's celebrate together!

~Photo by Grumpy Curmudgeon LoveHubbie Mark

Sacred Life Sunday: More Gratitude

We can never have enough gratitude, can we?

I have been going through a rocky recovery from my dental surgery, and I've tried to keep this in mind. When I am in continual pain with no clear end in sight, it is easy for me to to fall into self-pity, worry, fear, and even panic. Attendance at my own personal pity parties. Instead, I can cling to the saying, "This too shall pass!" I am constantly bringing myself back to what I have to be grateful for, and there is so, so much. This is a great coping strategy and spiritual practice.

Today Brad Shorr has a post on spiritual renewal with some quotes by Henri Nouwen that I found very helpful. Check it out if you are needing a boost and a moment to reflect.

Yesterday I also took time off in an attempt to practice observing the Sabbath, which for me means, resting and relaxing. I want it to be a Day of Rest! I am still in the early stages of developing this practice, but find it essential to my well-being. I currently take off parts of the day, slip back, handle a few problems, notice what I'm doing, and then ease back into resting. I need to learn how to draw firmer boundaries. I also need to learn how to tolerate having a lot to do and purposefully choosing to do something more important---resting. It will be a process, I'm sure.





~Photos by LoveHubbie Mark