My Sacred Life Day 10

What a rich process this project is! I am today one third of the way through the month of this project, and as Kelly has written about before, I find my life changing as I look at my ordinary life and see the blessings and sacredness it offers, trying to cull what is significant for this blog.

First I want to share the card spread I got today. My intention was praying for "soul sisters":



This reminds me that:

1. I need to be looking for mentors and role models, attuned to possibilities here.

2. To shift the energy here, I NEED more solitude. It is hard to find, but for me it is necessary. Processing what happens to me generates the energy that moves me forward in life, and more importantly, that keeps me from getting caught up in a type of cultural centrifugal force that first captures me in its movement, and then drags me down...down...down to where I feel like I'm circling a spiritual drain.

3. I need to work. WORK. Work at visualizing and getting excited with positive expectation towards what I want. Spiritual community. Rich spiritual community. Positive, loving, intelligent friends. Similar to Exactly like here, in the My Sacred Life community :) But in my local, non-virtual life, too.

Cool.

And then, I wanted to share something fun that started off my day RIGHT. I first had a quiet time, and wrote extensively in my journal. Then, I had a lovely breakfast. This was Castellana pasta with fresh tarragon, tomatoes from my garden mixed with olive oil, French salt mixed with lavender, topped with my chickens' eggs:



Decadent? Indulgent? Actually, I am switching my focus from "losing weight" or "releasing weight" to "reclaiming my beauty", which is scary for me.

First, I got rid of my scale.

Then, I stopped thinking about food all the time; I naturally eat healthfully, and love food...I just have, in the past, eaten to nurture myself and focused too intensively on this as a sole way of finding nurturance. I demanded from myself to stop thinking about dieting and decided to get sustenance and pleasure from food, and forget about losing weight...while at the same time, not overeating...

So I allowed myself this lovely breakfast. I would have felt guilty before, but not today. I am reading "Eat, Pray, Love" by Elizabeth Gilbert with Deb from Spiritual Anecdotes. I am enjoying myself! And expecting in the long run, that if I keep my choices healthy, refuse to overeat, and develop OTHER sources of pleasures...then the weight will take care of itself.

Of course, this is not a popular plan.

But I like it, and alternate between knowing that it will be successful, and occasionally being scared out of my mind that I'm going to be 250 pounds (again) and in a wheelchair (again). But this feels right to me. I'm a different person now than I was then, and am strongly motivated to push ahead this unconventional way, knowing in my heart that it is best for my body...and my soul.

It is Safe to Look Within

Yet another card from my Louise Hay card collection:





For someone very introspective, this card seems obvious, but if I meditate on it, I realize that it is harder for me to look within at my "shadow emotions" like anger or anxiety. It is harder for me to see beauty there, but it is possible. Most of all, it is safe! Hmmmmmm...something to think about today, for sure. What do you think? Is it safe for you to look within, and then, when you look to see beauty...especially with the more difficult emotions? Today, I want to link "safety" with "looking within" and with "magnificence and beauty" and with "anger and anxiety" as well today. This is a challenge, but I'm interested in what I'll find out.

I Am Safe and I Can Trust My Intuition

Here is another card from my card collection, which I believe is from Louise Hay:




It is hard for me to believe sometimes that I can trust my intuition, that my intuition is trustworthy. I want to believe, I think, that my intuition is screwy and that I can be victimized. However, I know---KNOW---that this is absolutely not true. My intuition is right on course; I just need to actually listen and have courage to follow through. And if I have listened, there is no such thing as "victimized"---all things that happen to me are lessons for my own healing and growth. And for everyone else involved, too. This is what I know is true.

I know we've started Week 11 in Finding Water, on Discipline, but I still have a little more to write about Safety...I'm a little behind. But it's all good, right :)

I Am Safe and I Am Loved

Here is another cards from my inspirational card collection. This too fits in with our Finding Water theme of safety. It seemed to fit for my day:






Aren't you just loving our reading for Week 10? I know that at the beginning of the online group ten weeks ago I found some of Julia Cameron's writing negative, but now I'm finding it so uplifting. I'm not sure what has changed---the book or me or both---but it's really seeming applicable to what I need to read and is helping to ground me through some storms.

Again, these cards are not ones that I've made myself but are from my extensive unboxed card collection. I think they are Louise Hay cards. If you know, please let me know.

I am Safe and I am Free

This is from my card collection. It was apropos for this week, since in Finding Water (and in my personal life) the focus is "safety". I didn't make these cards, and although I don't save the boxes, I believe this one is from one of the Louise Hay collections. If anyone knows, please let me know.



Claim this affirmation for yourself, if you need to. I know I do!