I've been busy these last few days learning some about my new job/business. It ends up that it is bigger than I thought, and will involve me entering the business world instead of staying home all the time cloistered in my forest paradise. I will be going to client's offices to sell myself and my work in order to win a contract. The job will involve negotiations and working with decision makers in organizations. And yes, there will still be lots of work with technical writing here at home. The types of technical documents are ones that I am unfamiliar with, but can learn to do; I'll have to figure these out lickety-split. I will also have to learn the technical jargon for whatever industry I am working with at the time. Travel can be involved if I want it to be. It is a "big" job, and although I am a bit concerned about stress, it is something I think I can manage.
Really everything will be learning for me, from how to present myself in a business environment, to how to be real and authentic (as in, be myself) yet at the same time impersonal and professional, to how to do the actual work, etc. It will be like jumping into a lake and learning to swim. A huge BE BRAVE challenge.
It does feel very right to me and very timely as well. It is such a huge manifestation of what I've been seeing for myself in my 50's, though, bigger than I ever could have imagined.
Yesterday I met with my colleague/mentor for 5 hours. I learned that this business is mine and I will need to develop it; I'm going to be doing less subcontracting and more acquiring of my own contracts. I'm going to have to learn to dress for success, transform my orthopedic shoes into something classy, and stop chewing on my fingernails. I'm going to have to get my hair situation straightened out. LoveHubbie bought me a very nice laptop today; this means that he believes in me too and in my abilities to do this job, which really rocks my world. I spent hours last night and today in bed with a messed up neck, back and hip, but still got a lot done. I needs to do oodles of detailed stuff like get a business bank account, get a post office box, figure out how to write up my client contracts and then write them up, figure out how to keep track of expenses, etc.
My breathing is keeping me calm. I think. Well, at least way, way calmer than I'd normally be.
I keep telling myself that I can do this. The Universe wouldn't have brought it to me in this way if I couldn't. And I'd have confusion or checks in my spirit that would make me question if this was for me right now. Instead I have clarity, peace, shock, excitement, and fear. It feels like the hugest BE BRAVE challenge the Universe could ever summon up for me.
I am certain I could never even think I could do this without my spiritual foundation from the Tolle books, TWL, and you all. Thank each of you for your support and for helping me believe that I could take on launching forth on such a bold adventure!