Predictably, or at least it should be by now, after three very exciting days, today I crashed. No energy, very low mood, pushing-pushing-pushing through the day. I have to remind myself that I am recovering from depression...I get so intense and excited and then...this happens. I've always been this way, though, even when I was much younger and healthy. You would think I would learn.
However, after dragging and whipping myself through most of the day and pumping loads of caffeine just to do that, I decided to be patient and supportive of myself (synchronicity has this as Rick's post today as well).
I canceled all of my activities for tomorrow. Although they were pleasurable and healthy, I know myself and can tell when I need a day alone. Resting. Reading. At home. Totally alone. I've been running around like a chicken with her head cut off. Desperate for quiet time and alone time and
Then I looked at what I was doing and realized that my eating the last three days has been on the fly and not up to my usual standards. Nothing awfully bad, but apparently I'm exquisitely sensitive to minor dietary variations (like forgetting my fish oil and eating lower-quality foods out). I thought I'd forgo my usual "gotta be organic" stance and "clean meats only" compulsion, mainly to enjoy some meals out with LoveHubbie at LoveHubbie-friendly haunts---and now I just feel very "off". It could be too that in my current state, I'm sensitive to little fluctuations, but that when I become healthy, I will be dietarily more robust.
So, for my BE BRAVE action today, I'm cleaning up my diet to be more supportive for the remainder of the program. I'm going back to my old higher standards in quality, as well as eating no processed carbs at all and no unprocessed carbs at night either (like rice or quinoa or anything like that). I figure I can handle that for a month or so, maybe longer; I know my body, and I'm sure I'll feel great. It's Wellness Wednesday, too, so this is perfect.
~Photos by LoveHubbie Mark, altered by Me