Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Wellness Wednesday: Accepting Depression

Today I've been living with depression. And yesterday, too. But unlike in the past, I've been more or less okay with it. I've been allowing it, letting it be. Letting myself be sad. Grieving some losses. Being okay with being withdrawn.

A book that really helped me is the recent book "Unstuck". I wrote a review for it here (see the first "Spotlight Review") calling it a "Modern Bible for Depression Recovery". After reading it, and after my weight gain resumed (again) since resuming Lexapro last month, I decided to go off the SSRI's again---ten days ago. So I probably am enjoying the symptoms of drug withdrawal now. It is not pleasant, but for me right now, it is worth it. The book really helped me to just be able to be with my symptoms as best as possible.

I should say here that I'm not advocating that anyone stop any prescription medications without speaking to their doctors. Even though that's what I did.

And I'm doing something else really controversial. I'm starting on a regimen for nutritional support for depression via the company TrueHope. Most people wouldn't do this, but I've studied nutrition for over 30 years and feel very comfortable giving it a try. I will most likely start on Monday.

If you're interested, here are some videos about TrueHope: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5. The story behind it is very unusual and the rationale for it is unconventional. I list these for those of you who'd be open to alternative approaches to depression. The supplements were designed to help patients who are bipolar, but are also effective for those with depression and other mood disorders. I know that not everyone thinks this is a good thing, and that's okay. I believe we each have to find what works for us, and no answer is wrong if it is effective and if we feel good about our choice and the possible consequences. And if you don't deal with depression, or if you already have an approach that's working, then you have something to be truly grateful for!

12 comments:

thailandchani said...

This is really important! Remember what Charles Eisenstein wrote about depression, that it is a natural reaction to living in a culture that is soul-sucking? I do believe that is what causes my depression and it's so important to remember to consciously choose to not be affected by it, to bring something else to the world and for others. Then the depression seems to lift.

Dysthymia (which I have) is a bear because it actually changes the way the brain is wired. I think I'll read the nutritional information. That sounds like a really positive approach!

Patti said...

I hope this nutritional alternative works out for you Olivia.

The only thing that has ever worked for me is exercise, and lots of it. If I don't walk I slip back into the blahs again.

Have you ever considered swimming or some other aqua-exercise that does not aggravate your joints?

mermaid musings said...

my heart and thoughts are with you because you have the power and I believe in you and now with my friendship and support and good energy, goes more power to you! yay!

Olivia said...

Chani,

Yes, I do hope that this works. Maybe that is the reason for my depression. I so truly FEEL the physiological component, and it's very frustrating. I've been in a total fog today, exhausted and pushing myself through the day, looking forward to when I can collapse into unconsciousness tonight. Soon...

Love and peace, O

Olivia said...

Patti,

Thank you so much, me too :) I used to aqua-jog when I had CFIDS and I loved it. Here I enjoy the walking because I'm in the forest.

Thinking about things I think I'd rather just have the pain and walk then do all of the arranging and traveling to swim. I think I'd probably have too many barriers to doing it. Before I lived in Arizona and it was so simple, as most apt complexes had a pool.

I'm still consistent with about 4 miles a day, even with the pain!! And I started doing Gyrotonics about three weeks ago (I've had three sessions). This is an exercise similar to Pilates (but it involves circular movements, and other differences). I have a trainer who is encouraging, but most important, who is teaching me how to apply what I learn each week to movement in the rest of my life. Things like breathing, not giving up when I perform poorly, etc. Also Jill Taylor Bolte's book, "Stroke of Insight" helped me enormously with being open to reprogramming my mind in this area.

I think I'm attracted to the Gyrotonics because of the teacher and the walking for the joy of it. I am hoping that weight loss will be easier now that I'm off the medication. I hope this works so that I can stay off for good. I feel like I want to say that I will be off for good, but after what happened back in May, it showed me that you never really know...

Thanks for listening to my rambling, Love,

O

Olivia said...

Carmen,

Thank you for your thoughts and good energy and friendship so much,

Supporting you in sisterhood,

O

Rick Hamrick said...

My mom has had chronic problems with depression, and I found TrueHope a few years ago. While I was not able to convince her to try this alternative--and I fully recognized that it was her choice and did not press it--I'm happy to report that she is doing better now than she has in years. I wish I could attribute it to some particular regimen, but I cannot.

So, bless the method, whatever it might be, which brings relief.

For you, Olivia, I wish it to be the supplements TrueHope offers, only because that's the path you have chosen. I wish you well, regardless of the means by which you get there!

Olivia said...

Rick,

I'm glad that your mom is doing better. So you know all about TrueHope...there is a little more research out there, but not much; they're still trying to get more done.

I don't care HOW I recover only THAT I do. I don't like languishing; it doesn't fit my personality. So while I accept the depression, I continue to work to get well.

Thank you, Rick, for your support!

Love,

O

kikipotamus said...

I can't start with you on Monday b/c my delivery isn't here yet. But I am with you in spirit.

Jenster said...

Big hugs to you, Olivia! As long as I have remembered, my mom suffered from depression but to this day denies it. It made a huge negative impact on our family (still does) but you can't force someone to see what they don't want to see. I so admire you for making efforts to deal with your depression. I know it's not easy and that's why I commend you even more.

Olivia said...

Thanks, Kelly, that's okay. I'm ramping up really slowly (slower than they told me to) because I'm either having withdrawals or my body is reacting strongly to it. I'm very grateful for your support, Love,
O
xxoo

Olivia said...

Thanks, Jenster. I appreciate your kind words. I sort of am forced to deal with it--my energy is so low, and my weight has soared--it can't be ignored even if I wanted to! But still, thank you :) xxoo, O